Tuesday, February 4, 2020

Twisted Love

School is back. Not that I have written since it had any ways. Here I am, writing into the nothing and everything that this cyber-ether has become in our lifetime. I've wanted to write this summer. I didn't though. I couldn't manage too. My heart broke a thousand ways this summer, my little love being the only thing that pushed me through. And, push me he did. Gosh, two was mostly fine for us honestly, and three has been a joy, but those two months, where he wasn't really two any more but wasn't quite three, they hurt. He pushed me away, he pushed me to the end of my ropes, he pushed me to the end of my patients. He pushed me to grow.

He pushed me down, down to a deeper level of accountability and authenticity.

But here we are. Stronger than ever. Once again a team, for now any ways.

This was the beginning of a post I began last April. Yeah, 11 months ago. Why, do you ask, has it taken me a year to publish it? It wasn't this part I was scared to talk about, no- this is my regular moosh, right?

No my loves here I am in my whirlwind of truth. I was scared to admit that twisted love was a reference to the fact I had began dancing. Sexy, hot, dancing. Not in the safety of a studio with suburban moms who drank a little wine for courage before their first class. Oh no. For money, in a strip club. Now, almost a year later, I still am.

That's right, wild mama by day and erotic fantasy by night. And you know the best part? The kiddo and me, we are doing great! And my sister when she got diagnosed with cancer in December? I was able to send her a few hundred bucks, not a lot but more than I ever could have before.

Honestly, physical therapy? for the birds. I don't know who i was fooling with that shit. Like I'm going to school for 10 years. Granted I'm not going to be you and hot and clever forever either. Obviously, I'll have to have a new hustle eventually. But until then, stay tuned. I gota a lot of good stories from this last year.


XOXOX
I missed this

Well This was now 3 years ago sooooo..... here we are

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